01 October 2009

There Are Those Who Think Families Happen By Chance

There Are Those Who Think Families Happen By Chance

There are those who think families happen by chance
A mystery their whole life through
But we had a voice and we had a choice
We were working and waiting for you

No matter the name and no matter the age
No matter how you came to be
No matter the skin, we are all of us kin
We are all of us one family

So here's to you, three cheers to you
Let's shout it, "Hip, hip, hip, hooray!"
For, out of a world so tattered and torn,
You came to our house on that wonderful morn
And all of a sudden this family was born!

I love stories and songs and poems, and slogans and blessings.  I can't help it, I'm Irish.
So before I get to the best part, the pictures, a little background if you please.

My beautiful Tara.  This is her right here with her handsome husband.
She is my firstborn.  She is my oldest daughter.  She owns my heart.

My husband and I have five of these.  Here we are with them.  Three daughters and two sons.  Some I birthed, (I don't know nothin' bout birthin' no babies Miss Scarlet!) And some we were given through an amazing miracle called, Adoption.  Albert Einstein said, "There are two ways to live your life.  One is as though nothing is a miracle and two is as though everything is a miracle."  To me, adoption is a miracle.  One of life's greatest miracles.  You can build your family through adoption.  You can know more love than your heart can hold through adoption.  You find Grace through adoption.  You realize how much God loves His children and you can put a face on the actual things you have prayed, and wished and hoped for. There are many kinds of adoption.  Private, Open, and through the Foster Care System.  We've done a little of all of these and each one is the right one.  These thoughts remember, are through my eyes.  Through the eyes of an adoptive mother.  A mother who loses her baby due to circumstances seemingly beyond her control, or a mother who chooses to give life to her baby but needs someone else to be the, Forever Family are other scenarios better told by mothers who have been there.  Although - now that you mention it.  You did mention it didn't you?  Even if just in your head?  Maybe it was just in my head.  Regardless, I will talk later, at another time, in another blog about how beautiful it is when a birth mom chooses the unselfish path to find parents for her baby.  CHOOSE LIFE!

Being the oldest of five, Tara saw adoption first hand.  She was there when we adopted each baby.  She was the big sister to each and every sibling.  Including the foster kids whom we loved and cared for, for only a while until their parents were ready for them to go home again.  Some people said that we were asking too much of her to share her home with other kids.  Others said, it wasn't fair that she had to share her Mommy and Papa with those kids. We had our answers then and we have our proof now.  You can never have too much love.  You can never give too much love.  Your heart always expands to make room when there is somebody who needs your love.

Many people worry that if the child goes back to her biological parents the foster parents and siblings will be hurt.  That it is just too risky and painful.  Tara learned early on that, it is better to do the right thing and risk being hurt, than to not do it in the first place. Foster care isn't the right thing for all families.  But it was the right thing for our family.  Each of us has been blessed by this decision in many ways.

Tara grew up.  She married the love of her life.  If I could have picked from all the guys in all the world, I would have picked Jason for Tara.  (Not that I had any choice whatsoever in the matter.)  Jeeeze.  Duh. So Tara and Jason wanted to build a family.  Soon, they had four sons.  You can see them here.

Are they not they a beautiful family?  But something was missing.  Someone was missing.  They all felt it deep down in their hearts.  So after discussing it for a long time with everybody in the family, they decided they had it in their hearts to foster a child.

"Do you want to do something beautiful for God?  There is a person who needs you.  This is your chance."  Mother Theresa. 

Then this baby came into their lives.  She was plopped, smack dab down in the middle of a gaggle, a clan, a crew of hoodlems and hoodwinks.  A hoodlum, hoodwinky filled family.  These guys here.

Well, the one on the far right is actually mine, but you get the picture.  This is them in
relaxed, chill mode.  Rare.  Very, very rare.

They are usually rough and tough guys.  They wrestle and make a lot of noise.  They are   b o y s   for goodness sake.  They sweat.  A lot.  And they are a crack up.  From the very first, if one of those boys was even in the same room as her, that baby girl would grin, and laugh, and squeal.  Those boys, in all their testosterone filled goodness, treated that baby girl like she was the most precious thing ever.  They kissed her and loved her and protected her from monsters and wild things.  Wait, they are the wild things.  Well, they protected her from all the other wild things. 

Then, when she started to get a little bigger she had to stick up for herself.
She had to get mighty with all her girly power.  She had to get sassy!

Everybody loved Emma and took care of her knowing that it might not be forever.  But they loved her as if it would be forever.  And yesterday, on the very last day of September, 2009 it was deemed and made official by a judge that she would get to stay forever.   So the following are a few pictures so that, you can share with us, that incredibly delicious, miraculous, joyous day.  ENJOY!!! 

This is Tara with Emma on her baptism day.

This is Emma on her baptism day checking out the two yahoo's (Auntie Maggie, and Uncle Dylan) who will be her Godparents.  Does she look a bit uncertain?
She certainly does.

Here we come.  Marching down to Department 23 where it all happens.

Daddy signing.

Momma signing.

Look how happy she is!  Look how happy they both are!  Warms a Mommy/
Granny's, heart.

I think I see a complete-ness.  A completed-ness.  A comple-te'.  This family is
complete!  Well, you never know.  Only God knows for sure what's in store for these guys.

We witness God's miracles in our lives each and every day; the sun rises, the sun sets. 
The sun set on a miracle in our family today.

Then Emma clicked her Ruby Red Slippers three times

and she



Then they sealed it with a kiss.

Forever and Ever.


Love you and Bless you,



tara said...

This is my favorite love story ever. Amazing job! You found your calling as a blogger. I need copies of all of these pictures, because your pictures are always better than mine! Love it. Love you, Tara

mimiomimi said...

Okay, its not even 8 am and I am crying - not that I haven't cried many a morning before 8am, but this time its happy tears. You did such a wonderful job on Emma's story. The pictures were perfection, the words were prose, and the feeling came straight from your heart to mine. Thanks so much for sharing this intimate and sacred moment from your family with ours. I now forgive you for not calling me back about going to dinner Saturday night. and I feel you are probably only about 1 week away from that 1.3million!! Love, Becky

Songbirdtiff said...

Beautiful story, thank you for sharing!

Serendipity said...

This is a beautiful post, thanks for sharing. Visiting from the SITS link-up :) Happy Christmas!

♥ Katinka said...

what a beautiful post :)
Stopping by from SITS and wishing you a MERRY CHRISTMAS :)!!!!

Kim said...

Hi, I'm stopping by from SITS. It sounds as if you are all wonderfully blessed and you've passed on your big heart to your daughter.

Christy said...

beautiful! We adopted my brother 33 years ago and it has been a blessing on my family ever since.
Stopping by from SITS and glad I did

Anonymous said...

Beautiful. Thank you for sharing.

Grace in my Heart said...

This brought tears to my eyes! What a beautiful and amazing story! I'm so glad you found my blog and shared yours with me. Many blessings to you and all those beautiful children and grandchildren! God bless!

Jenny said...

What an absolutely touching story.

About your sister.

I stick with my earlier comment.

You look amazing for having those kids.

And this story.


This story touched my heart.

Absolutely beautiful.

Thank you for sharing.

I'm glad you were the BON for today.

It was well deserved.

croneandbearit said...

How heartwarming. You have a lovely family and now with lovely families of their own. God is good. I have an extended family made up of Devoted Spouse, my church family, all the amazing bloggy friends in the cyberworld (like Pam and Sandy), face-to-face friends, people who are orphans like myself, my fur-child EmmaLou, the Golden Destroyer, and anyone who needs love is welcomed to join. Hugs to you!

WhiteSockGirl aka The Fabulous Bitch said...

Beautiful story. And Emma is gorgeous. Your sister is so beautiful, inside and out.

Pam said...

Wow! After reading the posts you linked in your BON post, I can feel the love and happiness just radiating from your family. It makes me want to try harder to be a better person. You and your family are an inspiration.

Anonymous said...

That is a beautiful story. My cousin's parents adopted, and took in foster kids when she was growing up. I think it's very commending for a family to do this. Bless your family! :)

"Cottage By The Sea" said...

Lauren, anyone who has fostered or adopted a child knows that the blessing is all ours. Thanks for your sweet comment.

Anita said...

Tia, as I sit her with tears running down my face, I thank you for sharing your family on your blog. Your children and grandchildren are lovely and in the pictures and your words I can see the love that surrounds you.
Have a wonderful day!!

fairmaiden said...

This is beautiful...no words to describe it..except love...pure love. Your family blooms with it...you are all beautiful.

Anonymous said...

Beautiful! I grew up by the beach too - your blog is making me homesick!

LBDDiaries said...

Goosebumps, chills and tears - this was an amazing post and I loved the ruby red slipper ending!

Virginia said...

I think it is truly wonderful that you went through adoption. I recently adopted my son and it is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I have gotten a lot of help learning about adoption from http://onlineceucredit.com/edu/social-work-ceus-cpa. I hope this is helpful for you too.